Rithambara tells us the three things we need to do to subterfuge stress in our lives, in the weekly column, exclusively in Different Truths.

Building pliancy or resilience has nothing to do with veneering over tough times and purporting they didn’t happen; it’s about coping with them and finding out ways that allow bouncing back with vigour. It’s imperative to be accustomed to a positive outlook towards life and develop skills in the midst of difficulties to fight the adversities and make your life merrier.

A happy person makes others around him happy too. For attaining our personal or professional targets, we need a better and healthier relationship with others. Nevertheless, when a person is undergoing trauma, heartbreak or just any other disappointing experience (which most of us usually face at some point in our lives) being optimistic, calm and resilient help subterfuge the difficulties. If you are struggling to move on from all such hard times, read on to discover lucid and worthwhile strategies on becoming pliant or resilient.

“Resilience isn’t a single skill. It’s a variety of skills and coping mechanisms. To bounce back from bumps in the road as well as failures, you should focus on emphasising the positive.” ~ Jean Chatzky

1. Cynosure should be on What you can Control

“Resilience is all about being able to overcome the unexpected. Sustainability is about survival. The goal of resilience is to thrive.” ~ Jamais Cascio.

We must understand, we are not in control of all the things that happen to us. Most of us, knowingly or unknowingly stress ourselves about things we cannot take back and keep on cribbing on what we could have possibly done to prevent the negative event. The best way to combat any adverse situation in our life is to develop the courage to control ourselves and our emotions to find out the best thing we can do to make ourselves better day by day. Ask yourself how much the present situation holds importance in the minutes, days or years to come. Well, everything has an expiry date- be it our good or bad times. This too shall pass.

“Someone said adversity builds character, but someone else said adversity reveals character. I’m pleasantly surprised with my resilience. I persevere, and not just blindly. I take the best, get rid of the rest, and move on, realising that you can make a choice to take the good.” ~ Brooke Shields.

2. Developing a Sense of Gratitude

 “Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend.” ~ Melody Beattie.

 We forget to count our blessings and all those positive things happening in our lives and concentrate only on the negativity that fully engrosses us. Simply, developing an attitude of thankfulness changes our perspective towards life and we safely sail through the storms. Be more appreciative of what you have and all the little blessings in your life. Remember, positivity attracts positivity.

3.       Life is a Test

“Indeed, this life is a test. It is a test of many things – of our convictions and priorities, our faith and our faithfulness, our patience and our resilience, and in the end, our ultimate desires.” ~ Sheri L. Dew

Obstacles are necessary for development as they help in promoting a sense of critical thinking, patience and perseverance. Remember, success comes to those who leave their comfort zone. Choose to exercise regularly and learn to love yourself first (don’t allow others to take advantage of your weakness) to simulate real-life hardships.

“When we tackle obstacles, we find hidden reserves of courage and resilience we did not know we had. And it is only when we are faced with failure do we realise that these resources were always there within us. We only need to find them and move on with our lives.” ~ A. P. J. Abdul Kalam.

 ©Ritambhara Kumari Upadhyay

 Photos from the Internet

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Ritambhara K Upadhyay

A Panjab University, IIT- Roorkee, and IIRS-ISRO alumnus, academician, and researcher, Ritambhara is a writer by choice. Her passion for reading and writing has impelled her to foray into the world of writing. As a freelance writer and editor, she loves to pen-down whatever comes to her mind. She staunchly believes, "Truth doesn't admit any impediments."

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