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The Pain of Lost Love: Regret and Reconciliation

Garnering a distressed heart
That is eroding away
With regular intervals
Standing up now, I am
Having been in a remorseful gesture
I resemble a loser of the game of dice.
When lengthening eyesight
Find the frontal area saturated with weakness.
Who knows, there may be a snake or tiger
Will they shed tears or blood?
Death or emancipation?
Suffering or life?
Weals or woes?
Though I know,
The destiny and consequences of this safari,
Still then to return back
Soul exhibits glaring hesitation.
Contemplating to be a precious pearl,
Upon whom bestowed enough affection,
With a plentitude of sentiments,
Kept secretly under the soft heart so long,
As much as the grief I endure now,
For not being able to be kept alive from the sharp sight
Of that suspicious, accused person,
See how failing aggravates the fright!
With unexpressed agony,
My heart is becoming stifled,
Eyes used to be drenched incessantly.
Thinking to go back from here,
When see after turning backwards,
The long serpentine path that once kissed the horizon
Suddenly disappears with the twinkling of an eye.
So many distances away
Left away green meadows, pastures, and cultivable fields
River bank.
Under yellow veil
The grinning mustard field
Sketches picture of bubbling life.
Oh no, absconding, nothing!
Where did we mingle?
My dear, trodden path?
On the back there is life,
Fascinating bluish provocation
On the front.
Immersed in whose innocent look
Submerged of whom magical enticement
Feeling so restless, obsessed!
Amid the way
Feet have been buried.
Blind I am, in dilemma, motionless.

Translation by Dr Alok Kumar Ray from the original Odia poem “Majhirasta.”

Picture design by Anumita Roy

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Sunanda B Mahapatra
Sunanda B Mahapatra's reputation as a poet is not lamely propped against the book-publishing industry. She has occupied her rightful place in the hearts of hundreds of readers mostly in social networking sites, especially Facebook. However, she has been widely published in mainstream Odia magazines and well-received as well. Ms. Mahapatra is a gifted storyteller also. Both in her poetry and stories she has exhibited maturity in exploring human relationships in diverse shapes and colours. In this light, it may be noted that women often are centrally located in her writings making a framework for addressing certain key contemporary issues. But, views and visions upheld are not coloured by biases. Above all, infallible clarity followed by a simple and lucid style lends her a distinct identity in Odia literature.

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