Mani tells us that parents need not wait for big achievements of their children to feel proud. Small, everyday instances can make us feel happy and proud. An exclusive for Different Truths.
I don’t care if my child comes first in his/her class or receives medals. I care if they are the ones who plays with the Lonely child sitting by themself and looking out for the one who cannot stand for themself.
When do we feel proud of our kids? When they are first in a race? Or first in debate? Or first in their class? Or if they are selected somewhere or if they receive a medal and so on and so forth.
We show we are proud by posting the news on Facebook, making stories on Instagram or other similar social media platforms.
Achieve Big
So, in short, we feel proud when our children achieve something big. Or when they do what we want them to do. Or when their actions are as per our expectations.
…we fail to acknowledge small achievements of children in everyday conversations.
All that is okay. However, a lot of times, we fail to acknowledge small achievements of children in everyday conversations. And everyday actions our children. So many times, we do or say something that make us happy and proud.
Even if they have achieved nothing, no medal, no rank, still we might feel proud. And it makes us warm from inside.
Proud Mother
Today, I will share some such incidents when my children have made me feel proud without receiving a medal.
My daughter when she was 9 or 10, came to me and said that in school, her group of friends … instructed her to not talk to a girl.
My daughter when she was 9 or 10, came to me and said that in school, her group of friends (composed of the popular girls) have instructed her to not talk to a girl. And not to be her friend. She was scared and did not know what to do.
I asked if this girl was her friend, she said yes! I asked, does she have other friends? She said, no, she is alone.
I told her that the right thing would be to stay with this friend. And tell others that as she is alone, she had decided to stay with her.
Isolation and Bullying
My daughter is a very reserved and shy girl and God only knows where she found the strength that day to do exactly what I suggested. She came back home quite happy. That friend who would have been isolated and bullied that day was saved.
She made me proud then.
My son was being beaten up by one of my friend’s daughters.
My son was being beaten up by one of my friend’s daughters. And he was getting hurt. But he was only trying to stop her. At no time he hit her back, I asked him why he did not do something. I had to intervene to get her to stop hitting, my son said, “Mumma you cannot hit a girl, ever! It’s wrong to hit girls.”
He was only 9-year-old! He made me so proud.
Reverse Racism
Then, when my daughter spoke her mind in front of 50 people about ‘reverse racism’. And how that is not even a thing. As it only shows and emphasises how privileged the White people are. And have always been. Now, when all the other races are sometimes treated a bit better, they feel threatened of losing their superiority. They label it as ‘reverse racism’. What a joke!
My daughter stood up to tell a man talking about feminism and how he feels discriminated against that feminism does not involve men.
My daughter stood up to tell a man talking about feminism and how he feels discriminated against that feminism does not involve men. It is about upliftment of women, nothing to do with men.
She made me proud.
One day, my son asked me, “Mumma, why do people laugh when others fall”. He felt sad as he could feel how much pain the person must be in.
He made me proud.
Respect for Elders
When my daughter and son treat all elders with respect, they make me proud.
Every day when my son crosses my desk, while I am working, he massages my back.
Every day when my son crosses my desk, while I am working, he massages my back. And when my daughter makes tea for me without asking, they make me proud.
My children do not need to achieve something. Or get a medal or get selected somewhere for me to be proud of them. They make me proud every day.
Redefine Pride
Let us all try to redefine pride.
Let us all start celebrating the real achievements of our children, no matter how small.
Let us all start celebrating the real achievements of our children, no matter how small. And shift our pride to everyday actions from them.
Let’s start acknowledging them every day!
“It’s not our job to toughen our children up to face a cruel and heartless world.
It’s our job to raise children who will make the world a little less cruel and heartless,” said L.R. Knost.
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